Sunday, September 28, 2014

Letters To A Certain No One #2

Dear Certain No One,

Maybe, just maybe, I'm too used to noticing people becoming annoyed by me.

It's the way their eyes slowly drift off, focus elsewhere, or the hollow enthusiasm, or lack thereof, in a person's voice, usually accompanied by concise, one-word answers. It's the way they prop their chin on their palm, with no emotion of any kind etched onto their face.

Maybe I just don't interest them enough as a person, or maybe I'm just too overbearing to be sociable with.

Please, do accept my apology, but do you really deserve it? Do you know how hard it is for me, in situations of social interaction, to be engaged and active, because if there's one thing I hate, it's being the "quiet" one among a group of otherwise acquainted strangers. Never mind among people whose existence I am aware of and my existence theirs, but don't exactly talk or interact often, in which case it's worse. What's even worse than that is that I feel I miss out. I miss out on making friends. I miss out on strengthening my existing friendships. I miss out on all of the great and wonderful things I could be doing, all because I am now afraid.

And really, I have you to thank for that, so thank you.

Sincerely,
A Certain Other No One

No comments:

Post a Comment